:: Freaks on the Loose

"I'll be your sexual freak, of the week!" -George Michael, Freeek!

December 1st

The world promised to stop AIDS by 2015

If you go deeper in any Gay Community all over the world; you'd find the funniest; scariest; strangest; weirdest facts ever. You just need to be an observer who captures cases and analyses them later to get the juicy outcome. I had a bunch of dates; some are scary, others are fun but certainly they are all strange.

Since Jardino is the gay headquarters in Egypt; the MotherShip for all Aliens; whoever is cruising there after 1am is homosexual. Guys meet others; dates; hook-ups and even french kisses. He was cruising as usual that Thursday night when he noticed another car passing next to him. As usual, he looked over his right shoulder to rate the guy and decide whether to accelerate and run away (sign of rejection) or slow down next to him and keep sending the silent meaningful looks and check him out. With that particular guy; he had to press on the acceleration pedal as hard as he could. I almost could see flames coming out of the back tires. His automatic car became a racing manual one. The guy he was flirting next to him, who looked back at him and hit the breaks violently as soon as he recognized the face, who stood there frozen while looking at the other car driving hysterically away from him was nobody else but His own Father.

The whole scene was unbelievable. When Mootaz drove back home that night; he was in total shock: his dad was cruising Jardino! He kept thinking what would be the appropriate behavior; what to say or how to act. Being out to our parents is the toughest thing to be done; but being out both ways is beyond explanation or imagination. He found his dad at home. Maybe he was just passing by? But why that confusion, from both of them? [Lesson 1: Look at the car number plate before hitting on the guy]. They both worked out that issue; and now they cruise Jardino regularly; and of course they have a lot of stories to share. Poor Mother.

He is known for being the perfect drag queen. Commonly known as Suzette. Lately; a lot of people are scared even admitting they knew him for a while; though he used to be always present in many outings and gay gatherings. Suzette was one of the famous Jardino Flags. Always cruising around in his car saying hi to everyone around him; since he practically knows everyone. For those who are new; he doesn't mind stopping, stepping out of his car and walking in his famous cat walk, a hand on his waist and "Hi, how are you cute? I am Suzette!". Usually, if the guy is really new in all this, he just stays frozen for a second and Suzette makes sure to be all touchy during those precious, vulnerable moments. The guy ends up by spending the night with him. Suzette made sure that many of the easy-to-get boys sleep with him; since he doesn't mind any fuck. He brags and usually gossips about how bad the guy was; or how small his dick is or even describe how how he could manage having three fucks in a row with the guy's super cock! A big circle used to be formed around him. People listen. Laugh. Talk. Early in 2006, Suzette was diagnosed being HIV+. People stopped listening. Laughing. Talking. [Lesson 2: Always practice safe sex, and try not being a slut, would you?]. Some went in denial; fearing that they are infected. Others felt happy that this man eater is off the picture. Suzette is still practicing unsafe sex; last thing I heard. Is it revenge?

I am calling him the Black Widow spider (precisely Red-Black one). Tamer is a strange character who falls in love with someone and makes him believe that. After mating; he starts studying how to end the relationship in a dramatic way. Every single person who fell in his web admits and shares the same impression about him. Tamer doesn't like one night stands; he is masking the whole bed/fuck process in a sweet frame from his creation. Instead of enjoying his time, he has to fake a whole relationship, then starts lying and making up stories all along it. At the end, he breaks-up and manages showing himself the victim. I happened to know the Black Widow's real face due to a direct incident that happened with me. He mated with Miky, my dear friend. After meeting the Red-Back, I knew some of his previous victims. I asked around and found a common pattern: they were all bitten, vigorously. I started seeing the very same scenario happening with Miky, which was very confusing at the start, but very clear after I met him accidentally in Jardino. I could almost swear that his real Zodiac was Gemini, not Pisces as he claims: I met a totally different person in shape, clothing, mind, look and behavior -could it be his evil twin brother? A friend of mine has him on his Windows Live Messenger list. The Black Widow is in love again! [Lesson 3: Spiders should be squashed, instantly].

Amgad told me this incident that had happened to him: "I was chatting with a guy called Ali for a while, then we decided to meet for some private time. Ali took me to his place where we had sex together [I cannot remember at this point if he has mentioned how good the sex was]. A while later, I dated another guy. After knowing each other; he took me to his place. [note: Amgad is NOT a sex machine, on the contrary, he is very picky and longing for an intimate time for a while now. He is just not convinced with whoever he meets; problem of negative Karma surrounding him these months]. When I stepped into the apartment, I felt having a Déjà-Vu: I've been in this place before. After sharing my confusion, my date turned out to be Ali's brother. [Lesson 4: Make sure to check your date's ID before having sex!]. I'm curious to know which was better on bed.

A common pattern, which I consider the freakiest of all: guys who sleep with other guys; have active profiles on gayDar and ManJam (as well as GayRomeo); date and chat with many people yet they clearly specify that they are "Straights". Of course they Top. No need to talk about that. Deep inside of them: I am not fucked, I am not gay. I top. I am straight. One word: PERVERT!

Gay life is very confusing for those who don't have enough experience and a good friend to face all the drums. You just need to have faith in yourself. Follow your very own pattern. You'll be Genuine: and that is what people are looking for.